What it means to have a wedding and be married

I am not expert in marriage or weddings, but I do know something;

You will be surprised who is left standing on your big day or the days after.

It was about this time last year, we started putting our first deposit with our respective vendors. And believe it or not, planning a wedding with only less than a year to your wedding day IS possible. So BTBs who still have 1.5 years and more to go, CHILL YOUR TITS. They will be like "In my defence, all the good vendors will be taken up very quickly." IMO, tak mati ok? The saying that goes "If it meant to be yours, never in a million years it would be for someone else." TBH, I don't read a lot of BTBs' blogs because some over giler, and uols know I very menyampah about these kind of things. Sorry nyah, no time for that.

Up til now, some people (I don't want to say who but I think you know the person really well hahaha) still don't get why I am "kutuk-ing" about other people's lavish wedding. I am happy for people who can AFFORD lavish wedding. Bless these people who have that kind of money and want to spend on one day. For me, I'd rather spend it on something else that benefits me and my husband because, well you know, it is our hard earned money. I diss at those who menyusahkan orang/diri sendiri/ tunang-who-is-your-future-husband and berhutang. Spend money you don't have to save face? Alahai sayang, people will talk about it for just one day. But 10 years down the road, people won't say "Eh ingat decor kau yang 5 ribu tu, lawa sey" The thing about people is they have the audacity to judge but they don't come out a single cent yet you spend thousands of dollars to please these people? Please. See, you spend so much yet people talk about it which will cause you to sakit hati. You spend just enough, people still talk which will cause you to sakit hati. Moral of the story? Spend just enough, let people talk but you are debt-free. And wait, why the hell are you inviting these kind of people anyway? Well for us, some "family" are unavoidable.

And a tip: Never, ever tell the bride you know how she feels.

Guess what my friend? You don't. Until you have planned your very own wedding and trying very hard to keep everything together, you don't understand what the bride feels. And oh, same goes with money. Unless every single thing is paid with your own money, don't ever say you understand how it feels like to pay for your own wedding. For us, we finally understand the value of our wedding that we have saved over the year for it and we earned bragging rights, well for the rest of our lives.

Anyway here's a wrap to #Rsyhrl3115Rnny. No more entries about hantaran, BTBs, bridals, food, venue, etc. This chapter is over and I am so happy for every single thing that had happened along the way/to me/us. I am truly blessed to have a husband who is super kind and loving. Now I know what's the fuss about getting married quickly. Apart from sex, you will be surprised how amazing marriage is. So cepat cepat kahwin okay? All the best to future BTBs and those who have not found the one, keep the chin up high ok. We are made in pairs.

Goodbye Kahwin Series, you have been amazing.

Percaya pada satu hari nanti -RR

(and yes, that is MY mantra, MY saying. Don't use it and wanna be friends with me. Pls.)

That cake by The Domestic Goddess

If you have been following me on IG/ reading me for awhile, you know that all my baked goodies come from The Domestic Goddess. Fa/Hana, the baker, was a fellow Cedarian and who doesn't love supporting friends?

It started with The Domestic Goddess charity bake sale in which I ordered 6 RVC for my CTs and colleagues during my Teacher Practicum. Then Baobei's 23rd birthday cake to our engagement cakes (yes, with an 's') to friends/families' birthdays to our wedding cake. It was easy to decide who and what cake we wanted for our wedding cake. Or at least Baobei's words made it easy, "From now on, we will order all from Hana."

Yup, so Hana it is.

We only started planning our wedding cake after Hana came back from her honeymoon in late December 2014. We requested 2 things: 3 tiers and red velvet nutella. The rest is entirely up to her on how she wants to do it. Just no fancy decor with minimal flowers because you know why lah.

TA DAHHH!

When Hana arrived, I was told she was busy, on the side, putting edible glitter all over the cake. And, from a video, it took 6 groomsmen to carry the cake to the table. Watch here:

Post by The Domestic Goddess.

And, from the pictures, it took 5 bridesmaids to cut the cake.

Oh + Shiq's #no1boyfriend, oh I am thankful to be at our wedding!

For us, the cake is for everyone to eat. The plan was to never tapau any of it home. That's why after we changed out of our nikah outfit, the first thing we did after the walk down was to cut the cake. So that, guests can have a slice as a dessert.

:D

We, of course, told our Bestman/Maid of Honour, that they need to keep a slice for us. But we only got the slice just before we left the reception to the hotel. We were literally gobbling down the cake as we walked to the car. No time to be glam. Baobei was torn between finishing his slice and getting into the car to go back hotel, so he threw it and said, "We are ordering one more cake from Hana." HAHAHA, my husband.

So anyway, while it seems like it is common to spend $300++ and above for a wedding cake (not sure about macaroon tower), which may be part real and part fake, we were surprised at Hana's prices.

Affordable for all 3 tiers + delivery + sedap giler.

Remember if you are spending so much on the cake, at least eat it and let your guests have a slice too. So pick the best timing to cut the cake for it not to go to waste.

Initially we didn't want a cake for the wedding but we are so glad we decided anyway. Thank you The Domestic Goddess for your cakes all these years and for being part of our wedding. We couldn't pick a better person to do our cake. You can also find Hana on her IG here where she posts up random bakes of hers.

Rings made by a Fairy

Well, technically two fairies; Sandra and Evelyn.

Before we met /heard of Fairy's Inc, we narrowed our ring choices with 2 well-known brands; Bvlgari and Tiffany & Co. We knew what we wanted though. A thick, platinum band for Baobei because his not-very-small hand will look weird with a pathetic, thin band. As for me, a white gold with a small diamond in the ring (yes, not popping out/ not sure how to describe it).

Then, I found Fairy's Inc

So what do these fairies do? Sandra and Evelyn actually will have a chit chat session to get to know you. At this point of time, you need to have a budget in mind. If you come in to look see, I am sorry to disappoint you but they don't make 2 rings the same. You must also come in with a vision of what you want your rings to look like but if you don't, at least know what you like and don't fancy. Round or princess cut diamonds? Matte or polish finishing? Braiding or straight brand?

You can read how my/our journey with Fairy's Inc started here.

So long story short, be honest with how much you're willing to pay. Doesn't mean low budget means it can't be done. Maybe the bigger diamond you imagined will not fit the budget but she will offer you a range of diamonds that fits your budget. That's why the key is to be honest. And like my take about GIA certified diamonds, unless you're planning to sell your diamonds or carry the cert with you wherever you go, no one will care if it is GIA certified or not. At least I don't.

Okay, so this post is more of the outcome right?

Give me chance leh to still put up our wedding photos.

Well, when we made our trip down to Fairy's Inc to make the final payment and collect the rings, I actually screamed! Sandra and Evelyn had clients, so Sandra asked us to find our rings at the collection counter. Yup, when you enter the Fairy Paradise, the counter on the right are rings waiting to be collected while the left counter (where you do your chit-chat and planning, etc) are rings that they have done as showcase (not for sale) and ideas you can pick from here and there. So I was definitely pleased to see our babies sitting nicely

Super, duper pleased with our rings and Sandra's service/honesty, really.

Special thanks to Gold Coast's sand for making this happen HAHA.

So let's go into details about our rings:

Matte finishing

Braided

Hammered matte finish

All chosen by Baobei himself. 

Braided sides

Assher cut diamond in the center (not certified)

3 natural pink diamonds

Smaller diamonds around the tails suggested by Sandra

These babies costs us close to 6k in total, with initial budget was 5k. But we were happy to pay for something that we designed and is ours. In Sandra's words, "I will not see them until you come back to send them for polishing."

Well, my ring is obviously cheaper, though with diamonds because platinum is expensive. It is cheaper at the jewelry shops you see at shopping malls because they are mass made. Fairy's Inc bend and twist them okay? So with a harder material to work with, costs more. 

Sandra did mention that some of her Muslim clients have consulted ustaz about this particular material where it has a very, very small percentage of gold in it but mainly made of some other metal (sorry I can't remember much) who said that it is okay. However, we are not taking chances and I promised Baobei platinum. So do your own research okay? A cheaper alternative is silver. Depends on your future husband lor. For Baobei, wedding ring was the first kind of ring he wore/commit to and abang bomba kalau fight fire, ring tak melt hahaha. So I allowed him to decide in the end.

Also, we came back a month before collecting our rings because we found out that as muslims, it is haram to wear your wedding bands on left finger because orang khafir wears them on left. And you eat with your right hand and what with your left? Yup. This was clarified with an ustaz and you can read them online.

My ring was fully paid by Baobei as it was my mas kahwin, while his ring is a gift from me! Hey! He can get an expensive ring if he wants to, I'll pay. After all the hantaran $, which is his hard earned $, paid for our honeymoon flight & accommodation, and I am very thankful for that.

So if you're planning to hint to your boyfriends or want really cool wedding bands designed by the both of you, you know who to find right? Tell Sandra, Renny says she is awesome. You will never know if you get free little diamonds like I did.

//I am left with 4 entries with The Kahwin Series with the last to wrap up about how I feel about wedding and money we spend on it, and most importantly what you will never wish to find out on your wedding day before we move on to Honeymoon and ....

You're a Gurame bride when seaside wedding is your thing

Picking Gurame Indonesian Restaurant as our wedding venue didn't struck to me one day when I woke up from my sleep. The reason I knew of its existence and that weddings do happen there, is because a childhood friend of mine got married there. What made me remember about Estee's wedding that happened 2 years back until now was the ambience. A seaside wedding? You got me. Call me lucky to have found someone who loved the place as much as I do which you can read the process of picking all here.

Why Gurame? You won't believe me when I say it is so easy to just deal with one vendor who is in charge of your venue, decor, food and little miscellaneous things like ensuring your wedding runs smoothly from A to Z. It is a bonus that the Keith (the manager) and his team are amazeballs. I am not saying that because I did my wedding there but you will be amazed how far these people who are strangers to you, will go all out for our wedding.

When I was doing my final fitting at TWB, I what'sapp Keith to ask if it was okay for someone to come by Friday to store some stuffs there as we will be coming from the hotel. He replied (jokingly), "Can but need to charge you." Baobei who was holding on to my phone when I was changing, read the what'sapp and closed it. Keith called 3 minutes later, telling me that he was just joking and thought I got offended that we had to pay to store items which is why I didn't reply him. Hahaha. I was "No, no. I am actually at my bridal doing final fitting so I didn't manage to read." Hilarious.

So, the plus point was Keith giving us a free hour so we could do the nikah and catch the sunset. If you're doing a wedding there, you will be given 4 hours. Either 11am to 3pm slot OR 6pm to 10pm slot. Since we were the first wedding of the year and Keith love us (I am just kidding but out of the kindness of his heart), we started our event at 5pm and still ended at 10pm. I said this before and I am going to say it again, please don't expect free hour because this is all subject to availability/approval.

For those brides who are crazy over chivalry chairs, you will love that Gurame includes such chairs for their outdoor seating for free. Now scream!

This seating is considered outdoor but sheltered. So if *touch wood* it decides to rain, you have the indoor and these outdoor seats. Oh, for the indoor, outdoor but sheltered and outdoor by the seaside, there is a total of 320 seats. So it was perfect for our wedding since we only have 300 guests so no one had to leave/stand to give way to other guests.

And yes, the chivalry chairs are gold. We opted out the flower center piece on every table because I hate flowers. So I am sure all my guests could deal with no flowers for one day because the bride says so.

You all know we chose Gurame's in house decor/dais. You can pick external vendors to do your wedding decor/dais, just deduct the prices for the decor/dais in the price list and replace it with something else (like food).

The dais looked very pretty in the day (you will understand at a later part of the entry why I specifically mentioned just day), and we had no issues whatsoever with the decor.

I actually like the white cloth draped over the hugeass cabana.

Oh, plus point is the seat for us are together. Not separated.

The best backdrop you don't get anywhere else.

This is why we picked a dinner reception over lunch.

This and of course, Baobei sweats very easily and we don't want the groom to sweat more because we all know how nerve wrecking nikah can be for the groom right?

And tak kan want to do sun rise. Tebiat nanti orang cakap.

These photos are taken from the extreme right of the outdoor but covered seating area. As you can see our pelamin area is glowing likka sun. Hahaha, but it turned out not so great.

DAY

VS

NIGHT

Okay the only thing you have to consider when taking Gurame's dais and dinner reception is this. The lighting is not placed right so people who took pictures with us on their camera phones, turned out crappy. Okay let's not talk about camera phones lah, even D was having a hard time. If we were to pull the lighting to the front, it might be tad too glaring for us. Unfortunately, this is a known problem to Gurame yet nothing is still done. (As I am typing, please keep in mind I am talking about Gurame itself and not Keith in particular because he runs the show with whatever is given to him)

The lights at Gurame can be a little romantic but it will be better if it could be brighter?

And also, we decided last minute to have a cake so we needed a cake table. The cost of a cake table set-up is $50.

This is $50.

Not sure if I should embrace simplicity but I think Gurame can do a lil better.

This is us, just out from the changing room which on normal days is a room for the staff to rest. I don't really mind the dressing room though can be small when we need more people inside and no aircon which I am okay lah. But... we wanted to do a "walking down then aisle" and the aisle is from the restaurant to the pelmain. I mean, we could do from entrance of Gurame BUT they have no back door. So Gurame if you're reading this, can you also drill a hole and put a backdoor from your changing room so we can still surprise our guests with our outfits and still walk down a proper aisle?

Oh, last but not least. Their sound system is old. I am talking really old skool kind of old. The microphone can be louder especially when planes fly. We had quite a hard time during the nikah when it became too soft. And if you plan to not take a band and play CDs like us, they don't even have mp4 or plug in from your phone/laptop okay? Plain old skool CDs.

Overall, Gurame you did good or rather Keith and his team. Major love for them! You all were very attentive and did whatever is required like topping up food/drinks without having to ask. My family members and close friends were very impressed with/by everything. If Syahrul and I were to do things any differently, there is nothing we would change. Even the horrible lighting at night, we will do it all over again.

Before this, Mama asked us to consider some restaurants in the East that have all-in-one but I thought it was a bit tacky and maybe because we have already set our mind with Gurame. Sorry, but I don't like cramped restaurants.

For those who emailed/PM/Facebook message me, don't quote me but if I am not mistaken Gurame has to renew their lease yearly or every a few years. That is why when we asked them in December 2013, they asked to call them (and can only book then) in February 2014 when they have confirmation of their 2015 lease. So can give the restaurant a call and just find for Keith. Please go down, and see the place for yourself. Keith will also give you a list of what is included in the packages, including food list. So trust me when I say it is better than asking me okay?

Also, to those busok hati people who said "Why must Izzatie buat kerja kahwin kat tempat mahal," can suck my balls because we tak hutang/pinjam duit from people to do our wedding here at Gurame. You asked how much one person costs, so my parents answered. Then ada hati want to say such stuff on our wedding day? On the day of our wedding, everything was FULLY paid for. If you tak nak bagi banyak duit (or tak nak bagi terus) pasal "tempat mahal" also okay makcik because kita tak mengharapkan duit dari sesiapa pun. Semua da bayar lah. Kita tak perlukan duit makcik untuk bayar yang belen lah.

Okay, since the last post to this, I have turned 25 years old and Baobei & I have turned one month. With many more surprises in 2015 awaits us. I am trying to finish up the wedding series (cake, rings, berkat, henna) soonest possible so expect more updates these nect few days before I share with you all more exciting things like houses and honeymoon and ...

Thank you Gurame Indonesian Restaurant

Thank you Keith and team!

What it means to be a #BrocadeBride

As you all know that I have set my eyes, heart and soul on The Wedding Brocade since the idea of getting married came along back in 2013, and if you have missed them, you can click on my journey here as a #BrocadeBride (which I didn't know that I am that until the wedding day itself). But my journey as a bride than a bride-to-be is even more amazing and has exceeded my expectation, again (how do you do that?!).

Stalking all the pretty girls on Instagram who use House of Lashes's Iconic lashes, I also nak for my wedding. So during one of their sales, I managed to buy about 10-12 pairs including their Iconic lashes because I planned to use for the wedding. So when Katt and Su (her assistant for the day who is also one of The Wedding Brocade's MUAs) were taking out their magic brushes and pots on the hotel bed, I showed Katt the Iconic lashes that I bought and brought along but Katt said that using hers will be better for the whole look.

Actually, prior to the actual day, Katt has been asking me to research on what kind of looks that I wanted, which I did but I honestly don't know what would look good on me and can be versatile for all looks. So on the actual day when Katt asked me what I wanted, I actually said, "Just do what you always do."

That my dear friends, it means that how I will turn out at the end of the day for one of the most important day of my life, is based on decisions made by Katt. I'm trusting her not to make me look like geisha/wayang pekji HAHAHA. Now, that's a pretty big deal because believe it or not, there are tons of pictures taken on that day with professional cameras and handphones. So it has to look good regardless who takes the photo. But the trust I had in Katt was established the first time we met. I have seen all her work. It is all over her social media for anyone to see. And no, the photos you see on social media has no filters/editing, just damn good lighting.

While I left Katt to do her magic on me, she was telling me stories about how some brides choose their looks and tell her not too much this and that, which is not her. But brides have the last say. At the end of the day, the pictures don't look good. When you pick the bridal and the MUA, you need to trust that they know damn well on how to do their work. You cannot be telling a police officer how to solve a case like as if you could do a better job. You know what I am trying to say? I mean, yes there are terrible make-up and hair done by supposedly done by "professional MUAs" but it is YOU that have to do the homework and always, always trust that gut feeling. It is always right.

At this point, I only had a rough idea how I looked like from the little snapshot I send the orang kuat's group chat. Then it was time to wear my baju nikah and get ready to head off. I needed to pee and had a great look at myself in the mirror. To be honest, I thought the eyebrow game was tad too strong for my liking. BUT, it grew on me and one of the MUAs whom my bridesmaids took (she's quite known and started her little bridal) was "Lawa nyer the make-up," and I knew it that this is why Katt is such a genius.

Okay, this is not encouraged because The Wedding Brocade has an amazing collection but despite my decision to have a simple dress for nikah that I got tailored, Katt lend me her belt and veil with no extra charge. She is not selfish and will help her brides when it is within her means.

That's the plus point about The Wedding Brocade you know? Unlike some bridal companies out there that I know of, there's no such thing as "exclusive collection" which requires you to pay more for that. Yes, the fabric, beading, the workmanship are more expensive when designs gets more complicated but why do you even have a "less exclusive" range in your collection? In my honest opinion ever since I followed my sister going bridal shopping with the arwah, I get turned off when they have a "higher" range which costs more. If you want the best for your brides, have the best for all your brides. These brides represent YOU, you know that? If she doesn't look good, it reflects on YOU. So why have dresses that are "less exclusive"? Everything should be like what a queen would wear. Nothing should be lesser than another piece. Yes, maybe more simple ones should cost less, but that's where your accessories come to life. At the end of the day, the bride's look is your masterpiece.

Okay dah enough. So this is my final nikah look (and all just hair and lip will change):

HOW CAN WE NOT LOVE KATT? Can we please love her a bit more than the maximum we can? I am not being biased because she did her magic on me, but this is seriously amahzeballs laaaaaaaaaa. I dah request nak shift next to her house, so she can do my hair and make-up every day. Hahaha.

On the way to Gurame, Katt was explaining to me why some brides have the #BrocadeBride on The Wedding Brocade's IG and what it means. Simply put, a #BrocadeBride is how Katt imagines her brides to look or the end product. Some brides have preferences and want things different, and that's okay. But when the brides trust her to do her magic, the end product is what she has imagined you look after being in her hands. If you tell her, you don't want "heavy" make-up etc, then you're changing her vision of you as a #BrocadeBride. All the #BrocadeBrides give the same vibe, under the same magic.

Katt was also telling me that in order for you to be in this industry, you need to be able to see other people's beauty. If you're the type who says "Alah tak lawa lah ni pompan," when in actual fact she is or some of her features are awesome, if you fail to see that, then this industry is not for you. You need to be able to identify beauty and want to enhance it. That is why Katt is doing well in whatever she does. She is able to pick out the beautiful features of her brides or girls in general.

So, the best part having Katt and Su with me throughout, is that they will keep telling me that things that happened based on experiences where tok kadi tak suka brides seat on pelamin etc, and they will tell me what to expect and what to do. 

Can you see how amazing they are? Always ensuring I am all set and proper. "Renny don't hunch," "Renny smile more." Haha. Then after the whole nikah is over, and our parents sat on the pelamin and we took turns to salam but I didn't know who goes first. I asked Katt and she said, "From now on, your husband is always first and right. Unless you both arguing then you are always right." HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Katt is so me tau. Same frequency!!! 

Then when I salam-ed Mama and of course, cried. Katt who has tons of brides who cried was coaching me how to breathe and what to do so that my tears will stop rolling and less damage is done to the make up/mascara. Hehehe.

Then here's me after changing:

I very gatal and wanted to wear the sanggul lintang mah. I have an oily face and was surprised my make-up is still going strong. Apparently, an oily face is so much easier to work with than a dry face. Katt is never selfish with her knowledge. She will recommend products that are good and long lasting as she is doing my hair and changing my lip colour.

See! Always there to ensure everything is tip top before they go to another area while we busy take pictures. I love their company. Kadang-kadang stories can be wild and we find ourselves kekek at the same time. Okay lah, one word to sum it all; GEREK. Boleh add 'nak mampos' at the end of gerek tak? Haha, I am very thankful to have them and be part of The Wedding Brocade brides.

Last look was the 'mohawk' hair, which I requested after their ambassador Dyan had in one of the photoshoots for their last collection. I have no ragrets (regrets but that movie kekek) about it when Baobei changed to his number 1 uniform. Didn't have a proper, proper picture but here's a few when we went back hotel. Okay a little secret, husband was in the toilet while I removed my dress and hair pins. Then teringat want to selfie so here it is.

This is taken with an iPhone 5 front camera and I think I look amahzeballs. Wished I could have taken a selfie so boleh put as DP butttttttttt my phone is crazy okay. It can die at 42% so yes, my phone was dead when we were at Gurame already. But this make-up stood by me since 4pm alllll the way until 11pm.

In conclusion, I knew that The Wedding Brocade was The One when it comes to choosing my bridal. This is a personal choice and knowing that I am the kind of person who runs from tradition but still want a small taste of it, The Wedding Brocade is perfect. Their kindness and how meticulous about every single thing, is an added bonus. Of course, the sama frequency when it comes to berbual ngan these 2 throughout. Best sey. Husband also loves them.

Here's some feed from The Wedding Brocade's IG

THIS IS THE "MOHAWK".

Remember the gut feeling I was talking about? It is always right.

To prove that I am not just having a biased opinions,

And a couple of makciks who asked Mama to recommend their daughters/future DILs. I don't need to advertise for The Wedding Brocade because Katt was also behind a celebrity's wedding, but her magic speaks for itself. Don't worry those future BTBs who didn't pick Katt as their MUAs for their wedding, because they are just as good. For Su, I really liked her make up she had on. When she helped with the touch ups, dapat look at her make-up up close. LAWAAA NYER. How come I cannot achieve that every day sey. HAHAHA. Nak beli jugak lah magic brushes and pots.

Anyway, when doing the "mohawk" for my last look, Katt asked me to ask husband mintak izin (ask for permission) if I can wear her upcoming collection and of course, if I am not preggers. I honestly thought it was a passing remark.

BUTTT,

When I saw this, I was "Tak kan my wedding that was 3 weeks back, baru nak tag me on their IG." Especially when they don't tag but just name the brides and grooms.

CASTING CALL!!!

So guess whose husband said yes and who got an email?

EXCITED NYAHHHH! My journey with The Wedding Brocade as bride has ended but who knows my journey with them is still not over? Whether I get it or not, that's a bonus. Just excited and a great excuse to go back to the room filled with pretty dresses.

PS: I have received Facebook messages, Instagram DMs and emails to rennyizzatie@hotmail.com asking me the price range, and let me make it clear that I will not reveal. Simple reason; Business is still business. There is a reason why they don't write the pricing on their social media, so we as clients must also respect that. But really, they are friendly people and will give you the price list and what it includes in their packages when you email them. Plus, it is always fun to receive emails when it comes to wedding. Even if you are "surveying", there's no obligation to take them up if the price is not within your budget or you eventually decide on someone else. But please don't ask me how much leh. Ok?

POST NOTE: Katt and I were chit-chatting and found out that since she spend so much time 2014 building up TheWeddingBrocade, whoever picked her this year onwards to be their MUA, she will be doing more of touch-and-go than stay until the last change. Her MUA who is assisting her on that day, will stay with you until the last change instead. I am not sure when that will take in place though. 

POST, POST NOTE: I had last minute family thing on the day of the casting call, so I missed a chance to even go for the Casting Call. Super disappointed.